FE, meet the Results. Results, meet an FE.

Like almost 70% of all the readers here, Engineering was a choice preferred by my 'parents' for me. IITs, NITs, BITS and Autonomous Institutions of my state. After aiming for every step of this descending order of hierarchy, even my CET score came low and I was doomed to choosing a college affiliated to Mumbai University based on my positive AIEEE score. Choosing the college was a tough task, as I come under the sincere student category which also may fit a bit of fun in it. The schoolish strict colleges caught my parents' attention first and I was admitted into one.

FE orientation did nothing but disorient me more, as the impressive seniors that looked really happy with our college talked nothing about the academics in their speeches. There was one guy who had topped the university in two consecutive years from our college, but he kept adjusting his glasses during his speech. (I detest glasses.) I kept wondering why every professor was trying to assure us that 'there will be no ragging inside the campus as we have taken the necessary measures to prevent ragging'. It felt like they're trying too hard to keep us safe, another cause of intimidating the vulnerable freshers.

We were christened with a common name, 'FE'. Every FE had a same face, easily spotted by a rowdy looking senior within 10m radius. Within a week of my college days, we were introduced to various student bodies who advertised their groups occasionally so that they can bag most of the loyal enthusiasts from FEs. The office staff felt like they'll treat us as helpless and hopeless 'customers' for the rest of our life to be spent here. The professors were sympathetic, but expected us to behave with the air of learning an undergrad course. Nobody explained their expectations and we chose to be indifferent about them. The Freshers night was super fun as defined by seniors, strange to the newly introduced FEs. As far as the upcoming events were concerned, they did attract me a bit. But the overload of 6 subjects to be covered in 4 months (with that level of excellence in guidance from Professors) forced me to say, "abhi ke liye reandey, next sem yeh sab karenge."

So then, tutorials, practicals, assignments, Maths, BEE, CP and Mech all decided to share the first position on my hit-list. The only massbunk executed by my class took attention of our principal and we were given punishments along with a letter to our parents. "We've chosen a good college for you so that you will learn better. We're providing you with everything you need, you making the best out of it is our only humble hope. Still we get such letters from your headmaster! That is a shame." were their words of condolence. So I decided to give a break to the imaginary freedom I had expected to encounter during Engineering and concentrate on studies. My participation during our cultural and technical festivals was of sitting at home, staying away from ragging-causing-senioria and dealing with Transformers and Trusses. (Every line of this paragraph has implicit ':-/' smiley after it.)

We were hardly out of the traumatic vivas and practicals when the exams hit us. My papers went well, not-bad category. I had written what all I knew well, went out of time for Physics and Chemistry papers. As expected, Mech and BEE were worse than 'as-expected'. Still, a proper checking would yield me minimum 50+ in every subject, was my deduction. When you are a 85+ scorer in 10th and 12th, you have this habit of judging your own paper from the examiner's point of view and calculating the minimum in your head to tell 5% less than your minimum expectation at home as your expected score. Once my parents said, "hmph.. we'll see" after hearing my expectations, I was a free bird to enjoy vacations!

New sem started and a month passed by so quickly, that no one even noticed! Everyone started to talk about the results. Some nerds from my division found a 'quick news about MU results' community over facebook and kept posting the updates on news feed.

Finally, the dreaded day arrived. I was with my school friends in the evening when my best friend from class texted me, 'results are out! iPassed!' I ran back home, searched for my hall ticket and put on my internet. 'MODEM is a device that can annoy you at perfectly the wrong time' should've been an acceptable definition of MODEM in BEE. After some time, that DSL LED stopped blinking and I got proper connection. www.mu.ac.in had an attractive 'New' flashing beside First Year Engineering Results which lead me to entering my number and hitting 'submit'.

FAILED
They don't need to type it in bold caps.
I had failed. For the first time in my life, my mark-sheet would have that remark. These are daemons, they don't publish your results in detail. Which subject, by how many marks, what went wrong, is there a hope for clearing in reval? Nothing. I had to wait for my college to display the results, which anyone, EVERYONE from my college would be able to read. I decided not to tell at home before actual results came out, but my mum got a call from her friend whose son was all clear and I had to break my secret to her. Her first reaction was a sad face. I knew dad's would be worse, he would look disappointed. It kills way more painfully than suicide to face a disappointed parent. I cried whole night and slept unknowingly when my head was tired of bursting with repeated "why me?"s and "please NOT me"s.

On Monday, I checked my result in college. I had cleared the rest of the subjects with 45-50 marks, got 39* in Mech but 23 of us in a row got 12-27 in CP with an 'F'. I pushed back my tears. My friends were there consoling me that it happens. Even when I said, "I know this cannot happen, my paper was good", they nodded with sympathy which added to my misery. Some of the seniors I'd known by then told me that it'll all be fine. Some encouraged by saying, "reval hai na" while some chose to be practical and say, "KT is a part of Engineering. You'll lose nothing. Placement me koi nahi poochta, calm down..."

I'm gonna let this post end here. I might clear my exam in revaluation, or might earn more KTs next sem, or might clear CP in coming year. The truth is, what might happen ahead changes nothing in the present about my past. This wasn't my first failure, and this won't be my last. So is the case with success. And it's not about failure or success anyway. It's about how I get ready to face what comes my way.

At least I'm glad to know Engineering better now.

Pros and Cons of (Actually) Writing an Assignment

Assignment (n.):

The term used for a bunch of papers, when an ASS writes on them, his own edited version of the original document to get a SIGN from the professor when both of them have no clue what it MEANT.

From long long ago, it has been a tradition in Engineering from Mumbai University to pile up the burden of slogging onto the fragile brains possessed more by video games than by the students themselves. This arduous work mainly involves a lot of wastage in the form of non-reusable ink, paper, time and half-dead brain cells, not that it seems much useful even the first time. With advanced technology, a very few of the adapted ones from phylum 'Professora' may encourage the fortunate ones to bring a word document as an assignment, where every soul becomes grateful for "CTRL+C, CTRL+V". The hours and efforts spent in this disturbing activity have consistently been proven vain over the years.

Us MU Engineers take Darwin very seriously and try to devise a survival technique whenever we're in the middle of a crisis. Copying assignments is one of them. Whilst some (Professors or Ghissus) may oppose it strongly, it is found to be the best solution to overcome one of the demoralizing drawbacks of MU Engg. I repeat what I had once said, "Engineering produces copy-writers."

Here is a display of how anything written with great presentation appeals to the reader, projecting the PROs and CONs of writing an assignment by yourself:

That's the sweetest Coffee Bites can taste! :)

We were at the cell (it's the dingy room on 2nd floor of our college, where we, from the technical society of our college hang out and work). Gladly, there was no compelling smell of smoke here today, so it didn't feel like a drag for the time. "Break me Joe's jaate waqt 1-1 maarenge, abhi mood nahi hai" me and Mehul decided.

A fresh batch of First years had entered the college last month. This technical fest lined up and the amount of work pending was one of the reasons us Third Year students had no time for bird watching in the new batch. Heard that there were a few rare sights of beautiful non-dumb ones; but we'd assumed they'll be sincere and attending lectures regularly.. In addition to this, we didn't even get to announce about the fest in junior classes, the second year arses had taken care of that, so there was no chance of catching up with the new chicks.

Note 1: All the good things happen exactly at the time you give up expecting them.

A bunch of interested looking FE(First-year Engineering) girls were asking Akanksha (MDO) if they can volunteer for event work. A smart one was talking like their leader, asking for the editorial team. Well, she looked *searches for words* nice.. the 'lock-of-hair-on-cheeks-decently-dressed-sharp-nose-talkative-eyes-good-grammar' kind. Pretty, for that matter. Don't think I'm gonna remember what she wore that day, it's not a novel! Sky blue T-back, brown shrug + denim.*shakes head to avoid embarrassment* Okay, she was the prettiest girl I'd seen in three years.

Luckily(!), Akanksha happened to direct her to the Chief Editor (me!) and she looked at me. But...

Note 2: When you're staring at someone and they look in your direction, do not deviate your glance in a millisecond. That is observed despite of the limits of persistence of vision.

...Bravery is deceptive. (And these notes are the result, hence being unknown before the scene.) I quickly started to look for something to look at. There was NOTHING. I realized that I was caught and turned back to her, now coming in my direction.

She smiled and said, "Hi! Chief-ed?"
"Ravin. Yes..?" I replied.
"I'm Meera, first year, Electronics department. (Same branch! #win) Akanksha told me to meet you to see if I can contribute something for the magazine. I know it's pretty late, but we really really really had no time with Kiran ma'am's assignments and maths tutorials piled onto us the first whole month! Kuch rahega toh bata dena please.. I'd love to help."

Note 3: It is okay to use 3 'really's and talk with 32:1 word ratio, given you're pretty.

"Yeah, there's still a lot of work remaining.. no worries. You, good in creative designing and stuff..? We'll be ready with the proofread compilation by 2 days, you can start with the design ahead if you'd like to."
 "That'd be great! You know what, it's my friend's birthday today and look, we made this greeting card for her all by ourselves and she liked it SO much..*realizes the topic transition* I mean, yes, I'm good at design and drawing thingy!"

"Wow! It really looks great. Guess what, it's my birthday too!"
"Really?"

"No! :P "

We looked at each other for a tiny silent moment, and started laughing! I know it wasn't a good joke ...

Note 4: it's not like, I can't crack a good joke. It's just that when someone you like is standing across you, your head becomes desperate to see them laugh.

Note 5: when a girl laughs at your PJ, it's a thumb's up! So whenever you come up with a PJ, pray that she laughs.

...and I know it didn't make any sense, but she laughed. Those almost-closed eyes, that wrinkled nose now a little compressed, and the cutest grin any girl could ever carry.. Wow! And earlier I'd thought she couldn't look prettier!

Note 6: when you're looking at a pretty girl, you need to realize this:
She knows you're looking at her. They all know it. They just let you look at them when they like that you are looking at them.

I could've kept staring at her laugh like that forever, but Trishal called me up for some proofreading changes and I had to say "bye, catch you later" for the moment. She quickly said, "Ravin!"
I heard my name in her voice 5 times, I swear! Conquering the smile, I turned with a curious look.

"Shall I give my number, so that you can call when you're done with the compilation?"
"Oh yes! Here. Save it."
And with the pride of (never asking and still) getting her number, I took my mobile from her and joined Trishal at work.

Note 7: It's better to choose work over women. At any stage of relationship. Always. 

I thought the day couldn't be any better. But I was wrong. Turned out that the new girls had bonded easily with Akanksha and were going to join us for lunch at Joe's. While on our way, me and Meera, started to talk about the magazine, the branch, the professors, term tests, assignments, holidays and almost every topic we found! It was good that we belonged to the same branch. She wanted to hear all that she can from a senior and I just wanted this conversation to last forever.

Right then, Mehul called me, "hey RV, ciggy leke aa na"
Me: "No, I don't want any today"
Mehul: "FTW! (Saala chamdi)"

Note 8: When with a girl, you don't smoke. Ever.

So, we reached at Joe's, ordered lunch. She said chicken was her favourite (Yay!) and ordered grilled chicken sandwitch, recommended by me. Joe's waalaa was outta change and gave her 2 Coffee Bites in return. She put them in her bag and we went to our usual table. We had the most delightful lunch where I found out that she stays on my way to college, same bus stop. So, after our lunch, we agreed to meet after college to head home together and parted to our respective classes.

Note 9: Time flies by when you're with the girl of your dreams. The slowness of time kills you when you have to survive 3 lectures by dreadful professors before you meet her.

So, we met at the glass doors as decided and went to the bus stop. Continuous talking was obvious. The bus came too soon. Even if it had come an hour late, I would've felt it had come too soon. We sat together and I hated that wind because of which she had to tie her hair in a bun. Usually, I have my earphones plugged in, my ears bursting by the deafening metal, but today I could use the change of her humming some romantic tune by my side. BTW, she didn't sing at all. 

As I said, time flew quicker than my thoughts and we'd reached our stop. She lived a block ahead so I went along to drop her. I noticed her walk.. Man! She was graceful. Even with the kiddish all-nonsense scrambled chattiness she had a touch of maturity, a sense of composure to her steps. As we reached her building, she made a 'just remembered!' face and pulled out the Coffee Bites from her bag. She handed one to me and we both ate the chocolates. It started another conversation about coffee, the best things about coffee and the best of the coffees. 

Note 10: When you meet a girl who likes and understands coffee as much as you do, fall in love.

And so I did. We continued to meet on our way to and back from college. It felt like love and like, there should be a word greater than forever to describe for how long I wanted her to be with me. We dated for a year; but as our friendship started to be missing during the relationship crisis, fights took over the most of our bonding. We mutually decided to break the threads and frankly speaking, the untied version felt happy as much as the complete one.

I'm done with my degree now and moved on with my life. I've found somebody who loves me and we do not fight and when we do, the fights never win. Here's this good thing about crushes. You never have to forget them. They're always there, right in your heart. Safe. The just fade over time and something more meaningful, more real makes their appearance blurred and insignificant. But you can never forget the time for which the surreal was special. 

I know now, that it was stupid of me to describe her like the one and only angel God ever sent on the Earth. It was stupid to use the words 'forever' and 'love' and talk in superlatives all the time. It was stupid to write so many poems about her. It was stupid to think of her liking my favourite band and chicken as a 'sign'! It was stupid of me to be sitting with the entire group and periodically looking at the entrance when she was late. It was stupid to revise priorities for her. It was stupid to watch movies back-to-back and spend prize money (earned) on gifts. It was stupid to wait for her and die inside when I had to keep her waiting.
But then again.. Love is falling stupid!
And that was the sweetest Coffee Bite can taste. :)

1's and 0's

Here are a few Do's and Don'ts of Engineering life:

Be alive and active on social networks.

Waste your day playing games, talking nonsense or doing nothing. Start studying only at night, after all the sitcoms are over.

Log in to facebook first. Then only open other tabs.

Develop selective listening skills.

Discover the regular hangouts with seniors. Always be present there.

Have at least one place at college that's known just to your group.

Follow massbunks religiously.

Do not feel bad if you get an A and the one who copies your answer gets an A++.

After getting a KT in first year, cry. After entering second year, look at the first years cry after getting a KT and say, "Overacting!"

Buy easy solutions. Buy text books. Know the reference books' names and authors to tell the external examiner during vivas.

Run to save the last seat during midterm tests Make sure that you're surrounded by 2-3 who have read something.

Well begun is half done. Half done gets c+ if the examiner is attentive.

Call a friend to ask syllabus 1 day before exam.

Ask friends to tell the full form of the subject before its viva.

Group study works only when there are 3 hours left for exam. Before that, it's an # epic fail.

Check the number of pages before starting to read the chapter.

Download like there's no tomorrow. Support piracy.

Talk about everything like you know it. Especially during placements.

Forget lunch/dinner breaks when you're working for a Cultural or Technical fest.

Never skip meals for assignments and studies.

Eat junk food. You have the responsibility to save the rest from it, so finish it from the Earth!

Copy assignments. Write the master copy at least once in four years.

Xerox machine is one of your favourite Engineering miracles. Worship it.

Stay connected with the class on WhatsApp and network groups.

The canteen person should know what you're going to order as it's your regular. A professor must ask you "are you in this class? I've never seen you before. Which lecture?"

Classmates hate teachers' puppies. Professors hate cool/beautiful students. Be none.

Stay neutral. Remember, increasing your tolerance threshold is a part of Engineering,

Do not complain about not maintaining cleanliness. That concept was extinct long ago.

Professors are not supposed to teach you, you have classes for that. They exist so that you'd know how to cover entire introduction chapter in one lecture and still manage to keep students nonplussed.

Lab attendants are Gods in disguise.

Office staff will make it a point to be helpful. In lunch break they possess the powers to make you feel helpless.

If you are a girl, enter the washroom the moment you enter college. Travelling to college even for 5 minutes is harmful for your looks.

Talk shit. Find friends that like the shit you've talked. Never leave them.

If you are a guy, and you find a senior girl attractive, and-
a. if she is single. Do not mess with an unavailable chick.
b. if she's a dropper. They usually talk a lot if you can supply good notes.
c. if she is sane, confirm it.

Creative answers do not impress professors.

Be late. Lie that you missed the bus. Do NOT extend the lie.

The Requirement of Attendance Vs Hotness and Popularity graph is as follows:

Attend college on all the important days: Saaree day, Traditional day, Pink/Blue day.

Either have an impressive handwriting or pull off a clumsy one. Either ways, write a lot.

If you know the answer, write a lot. If you do not know the answer, write a lot.

No need to understand what you write, just write a lot.

First bench is a necessary evil. Trolling professors by asking doubts is best done from first bench.

Texting cannot be written as a hobby in resume.

Parents and professors should be treated as exclusive sets.

What you do, what you should be doing, what your teachers and parents think you are doing should never coincide.

What all and what all not.

A short intro:
I am a final year Engineering student. My marksheet says I'm a consistent scorer (:P), professors say, I'm a religious bunker, parents refuse to comment and friends say, "how manage!"
In my opinion, I've learnt to use 'Survival of the fittest' as my Mantra during Engineering. Needless to say, I've enjoyed more, than how much I've learnt.

Engineering life is soon to be a span of four years expanded and stored in memory that I'll miss for the rest of my life. Chetan Bhagat has already ruined it for me when I read that Five Point Someone book in Jr. College. But, it's not only about how the system kills you. It is also about how you are shaped to rule the system. These days never leave you, they're the days when you are spared from the messy real world, yet have to deal with the toughness it's going to bring you ahead. Here, you explore and define yourself, make and break your future, build your personality at best and waste a lot of time over social networking as a rule.

In this blog, I'm going to write (in fluent English, Hinglish, regional Indian languages and sometimes, even in SMS lingo)  about my experiences during Engg, lessons learnt, relationships, events, pastimes and some educational (:P) stuff. Fortunately, I've had a bit of it all at my college, so I am hoping I'd manage to add what I picked up from them as well. This blog would be written strictly in casual words.
Not that I consider myself as a prime representative of globally spread Engineering students, thus contributions from readers are also invited.

Please send your feedback, posts and suggestion at:
inevirt@gmail.com